Balul de Simbata Seara

Toata lumea zice-asa,
Ca nu-i buna dragostea
Nu-i nevoie ca s-o spuna
Ca si eu vad ca nu-i buna

Asta mi-e norocu'
Si focu'
De-ar fi buna dragostea
Nimeni n-ar zacea de ea...

Balul de Simbata Searaⁱ is an excellent offering on the topic of love. Not infantile love, bumbling kids "discovering" bla bla. Not naggy old love either, doua jucarii stricate trying to forget enough of their baggage, piled up abuse and neglect, trying to throw out enough yellowed newspaper, rats' nests and assorted squalor to free up a square foot of something on which a new potted plant might be settled.

No, none of that crap. Adult love, between a young man who knows himself to be a man and young women who know themselves to be women. Not girls. Women. Not singular, either. Fucking plural. Because reasons.

Floricica floare-albastra
Toata lumea-i cu nevastaⁱⁱ,
Toata lumea-i cu s-o tieⁱⁱⁱ,
Numai eu ca cucu-n vie...

One's blonde, one's brunette. One can sing, one can dance. One's not afraid to walk the street in camisole, the other's fine with coming naked out of the waters. Neither has any problem in close quarters. Neither has children.^iv Neither is annoying. Neither is demanding. Neither has expectations. Neither needs help. Neither, neither, neither.

Wut do ?

Foaie verde flori de mac
Care-mi place eu nu-i plac
Foaie verde razachie^v
Cui plac eu nu-mi place mie...

Briefly, it is considered that the first to show up on the platform shall be the victor. The nonsense is abandoned as soon as it forms. As it should be.

The correct solution is displayed, believe it or not, in the 60s, in a film printed and distributed by the Romanian communist party. The girls kiss. Obviously, what fucking wedding, what fucking "sotie", what fucking bullshit ? He's going to live with both and they're going to love each other, what.

There aren't films worth the mention on this topic, spoken in English. Yes, I'm aware it's a large topic. Yes, I'm aware they made a pile of crap not worth the shoveling. Truth stands : there's never been something at the Oscars to compete with the simple stories of simple barbarians. Stuff like The Graduate are poor, sad, contorted strands of phtysic sputum by comparison.

Foaie verde de sulfina
Doua flori intr-o gradina
Amindoua ma iubesc,
Eu numai una voiesc.

Asta mi-e norocu'
Si focu'
Astazi una, ieri cealalta,
Miine iara, si-alalalta.

1. 1967, by Geo Saizescu, with Sebastian Papaiani, Mariella Petrescu (the brunette), Anna Szeles (blondy). Sometimes rendered as "Balul de Sambata Seara" because retards. [↩]
2. The root on which the endearing diminutive was formed which in Romanian denotes the wolverine. Literally, nevasta = wife, nevastuica = wolverine. Endearing because Romanian admits three or at times even four different diminutives on the same root -- and they're all intensive. [↩]
3. Sotie, ie, spouse, the feminine of sot, the polite way to reference the obsolete socio-sexual relation, is also homonym in this language with "let him keep her then". S conjunctive, -o pronoun, tie to keep. It's also the common way to express separative disdain, such as

   - Ai auzit ? Si-a luat Bula nevastuica.
   (Hey, I hear Bula got himself a pet wolverine.)
   - A, da ? S-o tie sanatos.
   (O yeah ? Let him keep it then.)

   The alternative would be "let him wash his head with it", the etymological details of which we know better than to go into. Tu l'aurais voulu &c. [↩]

4. Laugh, but your laughter only betrays your lack of experience with the third world. [↩]
5. Grape variety, at some point popular but meanwhile obsolete. Long cylindrical fruit, thick pulp. Name from Turkish/Greek. [↩]