Meet Miss Piggy

Sunday, 12 August, Year 10 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu


So you (provided you're me) go to pick up a girl at the airport. Because that's what airports are for, amirite, bringing fresh girly meat upon their wings. No ?

You don't go alone, of course, because why the fuck would youi. Which is all the better, because the meat delivery's not on time. Apparently airlines misplace luggage, so a whole planeful of people's stuck filling forms for an hour and changeii.

Just as you're about to write off the entire thing as remarkably ellaborate trollingiii the slavegirl proposes a cup of coffee, "clearly she's in some sort of trouble, give it a moment so she either comes out of it or not".

So we go for coffee, which is pretty infuriating, they leave these beeping pagers on your table after the order, apparently under the hallucination that Ima stand up and go wait on myself or something (the girl was in the little girls' room). But anyway, when we emerge there's a very worked up Miss Piggy right in the middle of the platform.

What do you do ?

You make her go on her knees for a mementoiv, right ? And then you... ? Seriously, fill in the blanks, what's next ?

Because "here, put this on" and then "give me your dress" so she can walk, naked in the darkness, to the car is the correct answer.


So there she is, this girl who's been playfully kidding about whether you know, taking a plane to go to somewhere to meet someone entirely new might not be the ... safest of choices. I mean... she could get killed, right ?

There she is, riding naked & blindfolded in a car towards somewhere. What a feeling, right ?

And then... well... she makes it to her cage. It was pretty funny, one day I was like "hey, I just got your cage" and she's like "Anything you can tell me about that ?" and I offered, with uncharacteristic generosity, "Well... it's got electricity..."

It does, what.


O btw, would you like to see Miss Piggy playing with herself, in the new and briefly white sheets ?

Sure, why the hell not. (That was a quote.)


And that's it for one day. There she's left, locked behind a door she hasn't the key to, behind a gate she doesn't have the clicker for, dropped by a mystery car that soon melts in the night. She is to... wait, her purse, rifled through, that she may not touch, her phones interdicted, her laptops slowly, quietly and uselessly discharging, neglected, by themselves. Cold shower & to bed.v


Morning came, bright and clear, an' Miss Piggy finds herself kneeling on a different floor, a dish of leftover slop in front and a whip behind, encoraging her to chow at an uncommon clip. Don't whip marks look pretty on the asses of fat girls ?


She ate it all, oink oink, and so now it's time for...


White goods, amirite ?


To you, the only remarkable bit might be the girl pushing a shopping cart barefoot. To the girl in question, however, the other remarkable bit was that she'd never gone out without a bra before. Or in that kind of dress. Or in chains, up a lengthy road winding upon a jungly hill, on foot. Or other things.

That's the thing about enslavement, the outside and the inside scarcely meet. Just like with anything else. But for a glimpse, fleeting as all glimpses ever are, at the inside,

Walking through the store with no shoes was a first and humiliating but fitting in your presence, so I felt fearless in a sense to be appropriately degraded.

She's brave enough on her own, but that's the thing about men -- basking in their beaming presence, select females are truly fearless. Army of the future, what.


But then there was a night, and a day.

Childhood was the last time I stared out the window this intently waiting for someone to come.


And then we went to the hello kitty pancakes whorestore. Well, we also went to the beach, but I'm not going to share that, and we also went to Arenal, which was nice, or to quote again

Especially swimming in a waterfall naked and trying to rearrange toilet paper in my pants

You see, I asked her briefly, and in passing, when does she bleed. And she answered without due concern. And then there she was, in the middle of a mountain, desperate, and bereft. And stuck with toilet paper. A most Soviet experience.

Life, you understand, is what happens when you're prevented from making other plans.



Oh, right, we went on a walk. Miss Piggy had "SLUT" spelled out in the red thick ink of a supremely fat magic marker, still on her chest. But then we went to a chinese store and bought a very cheap collar and a remarkably zamac-like chain for her. Five dollars' worth, but the feelings those five dollars can arouse...

We walked throughout the center of the town, people grinning at me, stopping to snap pictures with their cellphones, adult women gazing upon the slaves with unabashed concern...

Overton windows, rite ?

To quote,

It is an interesting way to live to wait every day for someone to pick you up and not know where you are going to end up or what you will be doing – this day was one of the hardest yet.

Such it is.


There'd be more, lots and lots and LOTS more... but then again, everything has to come to a close sometime, right ?

PS. If the foregoing weren't, somehow, sufficient humiliation, let's enjoy together a brief retrospective (right ?) of Hannah's ass (this year's).




  1. Here's a great hint for the slavery-aspiring girlies in attendance : if the dood shows up alone he's a "dom" in the adolescent sense of being, naimean ?

    It's just not done, cool people aren't usually alone. []

  2. This, after the plane's landed half hour early, incomprehensibly enough. Who the fuck does this, they never flew the route before and had no idea how fast the engine goes or how bumpy the asphalt is ? What, traffic ? Timeflow anomaly ?! []
  3. Seriously, who the fuck would go to the trouble of pretending their connection is through Fort Lauderdale of all fucking places, and then gets a local IP there to say hello from, only to not show up ? []
  4. To quote -- because of course I made her keep a journal, this is effectual humiliation industries inc, right ?

    Without knowing what to expect, I was calm and nervous to see you while I waited. Kneeling and then being blind folded after being stripping naked wasn’t hard but left me humiliated and feeling cheap inside – which was enjoyable and perfect.

    She uses windows to write this stuff, too. Can you believe ? []

  5. To quote some more,

    I was surprised and happy to find myself in an actual metaphorical cage. Hearing you and Hannah drive off caused me instant panic and excited. I appreciate being tucked in by you and Hannah, at least the sentiment, seeing as that was the easiest I have slept in weeks. Which can be confusing given the predicament I am in. I guess not having dumb expectations worked out.


Category: Lifespiel
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16 Responses

  1. fungicid ieai luat?

  2. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Monday, 13 August 2018

    Nu, ca daca strica trufele pe urma ?

  3. lol. cred ca scroafa asta stie sa bage botu in orice mai putin tarana din padure. da' ai si tu dreptate. hai macar o aspirina pe zi, ie biodegradabila.

    ea e tot aia care era studenta si ati fost sa mancati dulceturi la anime shop si ati plecat fara sa platiti?

  4. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Monday, 13 August 2018

    Mnop, pentru ca is toate diferite, atit intre ele cit si cu fiecare-n parte.

    Asta e aia care l-o tinut de vorba ieri pe-un tip pina io si cu o alta fata am tras-o de titele (frumos puse, de altfel) pe asa-zisa iubit'a zisului.

  5. Meri ma Freude... jura ca nu i-ai da o stanga. Acolo fix intre buci la purcica.

  6. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Wednesday, 15 August 2018

    Nu cumva ai scris gresit antre ? Ca-n vantre ?

  7. a zis odata un mos p-aici ca "copii, nu futeti cu bube". zic sa nu clatinam bucile pamantului ca poate face urat Futatorul.

    nuca antre n-are cum sa fie ca antreul e bautura si limbi.

  8. How much monsanto have you taken outta her?

  9. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Sunday, 19 August 2018

    10lbs in 2 weeks.

  10. my guess is it's dioxin, both in the makeup and the food. i don't know which brand but it must be some big shit, 2 in 3 girls in Spain look exactly the fucking same.

    just gas everyone, whatever.

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