Klye, or Confession of a Degenerate. Adnotated.

Before we proceed, let's arm ourselves with a tinsy bit of history.

mircea_popescu: ;;google site:log.bitcoin-assets.com klye harem
gribble: NEXT: 04-05-2014 - #bitcoin-assets log - bitcoin-assets.com: http://btcbase.org/log/?date=04-05-2014; NEXT: 03-05-2014 - #bitcoin-assets log - bitcoin-assets.com: http://btcbase.org/log/?date=03-05-2014; NEXT: 07-05-2014 - #bitcoin-assets log: http://btcbase.org/log/?date=07-05-2014&bots=true

Speaking of which, maybe it's time someone does something about the elements on that page so google can actually index discussions rather than just sprout out "next" for everything ? But anyway, the discussion in question :

KLYE: I was summoned here by an email. How goes all?
mircea_popescu: KLYE what's this strip cam biz ?

KLYE: It's my initial seeding of what eventually will be the new standard for live adult entertainment
mircea_popescu: KLYE do explain.

KLYE: Well MP. Right now I am collecting initial investment capital to acquire my Studio proper equipment and space to essentially prove that my business plan is profitable and viable.
mircea_popescu: KLYE who's going to camwhoire for you ?

KLYE: I have a local harem here. And I am constantly recruiting both locally and abroad. As it sits at this current moment I am looking into exactly what Cameras I'd like to invest in.. I need PTZ technology built in. But I also don't want to invest in cheap hardware and have it break quickly.
mircea_popescu: You don't say. Have this local harem strip and hold a sign saying "hello mp!".

fluffypony: That's a good starting point.
KLYE: Hahaha. That can be arranged MP.
mircea_popescu: Go for it.

fluffypony: Plus it'll be fun, I'm tired of .bait.
BingoBoingo: .bait
ozbot: http://37.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5lzsqtYG31qzpi5po1_1280.jpg
KLYE: My one is away at school at the moment. Another is enroute from BC.. I have a small handful of girls that would enjoy this though. Once I explain to them who you are I imagine they would without question. Do you mind if I quickly go check my threads and email? I slept a little longer than I wanted to this morning and need to catch up with a few investors I imagine.
hanbot: 'evening all
mircea_popescu: KLYE well so you have a few hours, set something up.

ThickAsThieves: Hello hanbot.
KLYE: Hahaha, The thing about whores MP is they are not easily summon-able. Hard to get them over (let alone all of them in one room) and an absolute bastard to get them to leave once they are here.. :P
mircea_popescu: Much like kyle's camho biz does not need super cameras as much as it needs super eager sluts.

KLYE: That, And it is a terrible conflict of interest for all of my consorts to know about eachother. I am honest with them I am not monogamous.. But I haven't tested putting them in close proximity to one another.
mircea_popescu: KLYE the difference between a harem and anything else is that the harem does things on the spot.

I would say this is an apt summary : a generally polite kid with great ambitions and a penchant for misrepresenting the situation of fact.ⁱ This is a dangerous habit, because as the Fathers of the Church teach us all sins flow from the unholy marriage of vanity with weakness. By the time you have a teenager lying about his "harem", both vanity and weakness are amply on parade, and the matter certainly can't end well.

As it hasn't :

Confession of a Degenerate
June 06, 2014, 06:38:33 PM

Hello all, I have a matter I must get off of my chest as it is eating me alive and I can no longer pretend that I'm ok with it.ⁱⁱ

I recently started an IPO for my web based porn studio by the name of Klyemax.
The initial IPO offered 250,000 shares at a price of .0001 for a total of 25BTC to start up.
A small amount of the funds were used to procure TLD's as well as for advertising.
The rest I ended up investing into Just-Diceⁱⁱⁱ. This is where I made my first mistake.

JD sustained some loses to bankroll and I began to gamble the IPO funds in order to recuperate loses.^iv

At first it was only small amounts I would aim to win to replace any lost funds.^v
Then the gambling became worse, I started to gamble the funds every other day, often winning half or full BTC and stuffing them in my pocket.^vi

For roughly 8-10 days this went on, And I ended up 14+ BTC. Most of which were used to purchase miners or cashed out and spent on drinks and VLT gambling at a local pub where I was attempting to get the waitresses to come work for me.^vii In hindsight I felt as if I was untouchable and that with all this new found success and ambition I would surely not have to worry about losing either the funds or my sanity.^viii

On may 29th I had deposited the IPO money into my gambling account and began my ritual 33% martingale.^ix
As always the balance of the account began to climb and i watched with excitement and money lust as riches flowwed my direction.^x

Suddenly everything I had been planning, all of what I was working towards, All of the investment I had sworn to use for good..
It crashed.. I went from 24 BTC down to 10 before I even stopped hitting the "lo" key on my martingale.
My heart sunk in my chest and I felt an unexplainable/unbearable pressure in my chest.
It was at that moment I realized that I had fucked over not only my investors, but myself and my reputation.^xi
Frantically I began betting with the 10 BTC...^xii Trying to recoup the loses I had just endured..^xiii
This was all in vain however, I watched my balance drop like a stone in a pond.. I remember as the balance hit zero..
My feeble attempts to recover the BTC^xiv were met with tears shortly after it sunk in what I had just done.
The feeling was worse than anything you could possibly imagine.. Akin to losing a family member or worse.^xv

I sat there, in disbelief my emotions wrecked as reality set in that I had made a terrible terrible mistake.

To all investors, I sincerely appologize for misusing the funds you have trusted me with.
It was never my intention to use the funds as I did^xvi, I had plans and budgets developed for them.
But my vile nature and greed blinded me.. And I failed you all.

This is a massive set back, which is entirely my fault.^xvii

I will continue to try to try and develop Klyemax and get revenue streams flowing.^xviii But I have set us back immensely with my own lack of control and inability to know when to stop. This should have never happened and I am deeply troubled by it.

As stated before I will continue to pay out dividends to all invested.^xix Thoughts of suicide have crossed my mind more than a few times in the past week but I am unable to leave my investors high and dry due to my lack of control.^xx
Through porn or through any other revenue stream I can procure I will pay back investors funds in full^xxi, This may take me some time but I am not going to bail on the people who shared my vision and supported my en-devour.

This has been very stressful, I have lost countless hours of sleep and had not until now the strength to admit what has been done.^xxii
I ask for your understanding and forgiveness at this time.. I also promise to all investors you will receive your investment back via dividends over time and phase 2 is still likely to happen, at which point you are more than welcome to sell off your shares for the agreed face value as stated in the IPO.

Hopefully I can focus more on getting more talent and revenue going to pay back investors more quickly, Given the fact I may be able to sleep at night having gotten this burden out from beneath my heart.

Feel free to PM me hate mail / death threats and neg rep the shit out of me.
I will not run nor hide. I am going to deal with this as I am able to the only way that makes sense at this point in time.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Cheers,

Kyle.T

I will say one thing : this kid, for all his foibles, is much closer to the Peter Lambert end of the scale than to the idiot end of the scale. And, through the virtue of the passage of time, his alleged exposure (25 BTC ?) is not nearly something as important as the tens of thousands early idiots have dangling on their tails. It's becoming more human, and perhaps in this we may in a little more time find a solution for the greatest problem plaguing Bitcoin : the problem of the innocent stupidity of youth.^xxiii

1. To give outsiders a little leg up, so the disparity between them and insiders when it comes to spotting the lulz isn't quite as drastic : I'm known for keeping slaves. It goes like this :

   

   (Yes, that's the suit I rode in, around the Pyramids. Yes, that's in a bar somewhere. Phinnaeus eatcher heart out :D) [↩]

2. A conscience ?! [↩]
3. There's a very old post by MPOE-PR in which she explains in the presence of the forum muppets that for their needs and intellectual abilities, "investing" in a dice site is perfectly adequate. They can fix their desired return, be it 10% or 100% or whatever else, and they can even fix the interval of the reporting periods according to their humor : just as soon as they click, a new report is out. No more "any updates ?" wail required.

   This is fundamentally what they wish to see, judging from three years of accumulated "wisdom" contributed by the "community". This exactly. So then why bother doing it by hand, when an actual site dedicated to Bitcoin gambling offers provably fair results and only takes a 1-2% cut ? The various artisans of the "investment" certainly take a larger cut, statistically speaking.

   In this spirit, that an actual JD investment (like MPIF holds, for instance) dissolving into a gambling "investment" scarcely surprises anyone. After all, this kid grew up on the forum, not on -assets. It'd show, wouldn't it. [↩]

4. Se solicita recuperarea investitiei, as the Romanians would put it. [↩]
5. This fallacy proposing that an agent's aims have any weight or any importance whatsoever is perhaps the most pernicious evil rotting the very roots of our once great tree. You see it everywhere, "But I only wanted to...", as if the relative smallness of the aim as perceived by the speaker has any bearing on whether he's getting shot or not. The mouse also only wanted a small bit of cheese, but it hung for it nevertheless. More importantly, the mouse has much better sense than your average white kid, in that it doesn't stick around to argue with you about just how big the cheese he wanted actually was. Which explains why in all the futures possible you will have mice, but in most of them you won't have white kids. [↩]
6. Do you have any idea how many "wall street traders" under 30 are in this exact situation today ?

   Do you even dare guess, should you happen to be an older, actual professional, tasked with supervising the moral turpitude of the younger generation ? I tell you, if I owned a wall street firm I'd sell it, if I were running it I'd quit, there's just no way to do business with this crud. No way whatsoever. [↩]

7. 

   Do you know what I am saying ? Can you begin to imagine how annoying a derpy kid can get to a bunch of waitresses ? I know, because I'm the guy they laugh at him with. Which also makes me the last thread keeping them more or less anchored to reality, and to the mostly doomed hope that there exist actual men somewhere in this world still. Not boys you see. Men. [↩]

8. Because ambition is a fucking positive to your security now.

   Oh poor Pascal, oh rotten chair, oh long forgotten room. Ambition is now a font of safety, ambition makes one untouchable. Herp.

   Meanwhile back on planet earth, previous success is no guarantee of future success, and all ills of this world come from the fact that man can't sit put in a room, on a chair. [↩]

9. You may think this is a minor point. I do not.

   Consider how nicely it dovetails into mainline stupidity : "all the other kids are doing it" and "that's the way I've always done it", ie, collectivism and ritual - the two pillars of nonthink in the history of human thought - readily reduce to the same thing. What thing is that ?

   Well, let me tell you an anecdote : it turns out that dogs don't have very good operational memory, which means that if you show a dog two doors, of which one leads to food, and then flash a light above the door with food right before opening both, the dog forms a reflex to follow the light. However, if you wait a while with opening those doors, and the while is longer than a few seconds, the dog's pretty much helpless. The only exception are 10% or so of the brighest dogs, who form the habit to point their nose at the light when the light flashes, stay put, then go the way their truffle points once the door opens. So yes, there is something to be said for rituals IN DOGS. Not in people. Which is what most everyone on the Internet is, anyway.

   So, yes : "that's the way it's done over time" and "that's the way it's done over place" = "my brain dun werk halp halp!". [↩]

10. This kid reads a lot of online porn. He sucking founds like it! [↩]
11. Right ? [↩]
12. Right ? [↩]
13. Right ? [↩]
14. May reasonable attempts to lose BTC count as "feeble" attempts to gain BTC ? Why ? [↩]
15. Here's the beauty of it : everyone, each and every last one of you, will lose more family members than you have fingers. Your mother will die. Your father will die. That's two. Your grandparents will all die. That's at least four, and the count is by now 6+. If you're any sort of a good parent you'll have more than a coupla kids, and at least one of those will die too. If your parents idem, at least one of your siblings will similarly die. Are we at 10 yet ? Maybe you owe money and lose a finger so here we go.

    NOT MOTHERFUCKING UNIMAGINABLE. Quite common. Rather banal. An uninteresting and unremarkable fact of life. If you're challenged by imagining the feeling of losing a member of your family, you're not old enough to run a business. Or vote. Or drink. Or play with your wee wee for that matter - there's millions down the drain each day.

    But for my own curiosity, what's worse ? I dislike this "or worse" cop out lain there to hedge bets, just in case. What, I wish to know, is worse, to the infantile West ? Certainly living to see the TSA still exist and PATRIOT never sunset doesn't seem to be worse. Here, have a laugh at this :

    So many of my childhood memories involved unsupervised time in cars in parking lots just like the one where I’d left my son. I wondered in the days after it happened if being back home, out of the city, had given me a sort of momentary amnesia. I’d forgotten that more than 25 years had passed since those unsupervised childhood hours. And a lot could change in 25 years, I thought. People were always saying how the world was a more dangerous place than it had been when I was growing up. I had no reason not to believe them. I felt guilty and ashamed. I felt I’d put my child at risk for my own momentary convenience.

    Seeing idiots honestly think that "the world" is dangerous just because they lack emotional maturity is obviously not worse, you're not liable to stand up and tell all the retarded 11 yo mothers in their forties to shut the fuck up, are you. Your country fell apart long ago, you didn't care then, you don't care now, so... what's worse ?

    Cancer, I guess, right ? I wouldn't worry too much : who ever heard of cancer getting cancer ? [↩]

16. A forum CEO is someone who uses funds in ways he had no intention of using them. Laugh all you will, for Buffett is laughing more. [↩]
17. There's a difference between set back and failure. This is failure. [↩]
18. Bad idea, kid. You should not "try" to do that which you are sorely unequipped to do. Instead, do that which all you noobs should have done on your 2nd day : start reading the #bitcoin-assets logs.

    Do that for the rest of the year, then we'll see. [↩]

19. Can you begin to believe this bullshit ?! What dividends! Out of motherfucking what is a bankrupt endeavour going to pay "dividends" ?

    Please kids, stop with the nonsense. It's high time y'all grew up already. [↩]

20. Yeah, totally, dude. Go kill yourself because you crashed an old Honda, nobody died, you didn't get hurt but an old Honda is so motherfucking important we disembowel ourselves over that now. What is this, Samurai On A Budget, volume 18 ? [↩]
21. Go get anarkitty to come to fucking assets, I want to talk to her. That's a start already. [↩]
22. Gotta love the impersonal. [↩]
23. That's right : none of the gargle the various "experts" in their own mind posit as being problems are in fact anything of the kind. This, however... this is. A huge fucking problem. [↩]