Friday, 14 February, Year 12 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu

Let's recount this backwards.

So yesterday we were sitting around the tablei and for whatever reasonii I decided to attach my magnetsiii to an ear. The slut the ear was attached to doing the bashfuliv I had to be a man, and since it was an ear we were talking about, well.... com'ear!v

This led another slut to protest ("you have to be stopped!", she said) because earlier in the livingroom (we have this nice pornset-style sectional we play around on -- you should see Hannah suck Nicole's cock while taking mine from behind) I had said "it's a visual gag", which rolled all the eyes so far inside the heads they could see their own brains.

But the reason I said that was because even earlier, while a nameless cheap whorevi was being tied to the staircase (to be beaten, with a belt and with a special, very bite-y lash, and I think I got her with the rope too, it gets fuzzy -- come to think of it I should have probably titled this "The Fuzzy Frenzy") one in the audience said (by way of encouragement) that the slut in question's part of a staircase now, which is pretty cool. To which the delightfully misfortunate victim retorted that she'd rather be part of a candelabra.

This brought memories flooding back to the great slut omnimind, and it then spoke through another of the many mouths upon its abstract body made up of the collected bodies composing it, for you see, once, twelve years ago I shoved a candle up down girly throat, and lit it, and had her hold it up for light. And told her, "you're now a candelabra."

Fun, huh ?

But the thing she didn't at the time realise, this great slut omnimind that still can't omni further than the individual sluts composing it, the thing she didn't notice was that... well... you're aware labra's lips in Italian (and practically speaking Latin, too), yes ? Of course I said "you're now a candle-labra" ! Get a load of that, 10+ years aged pun! Slowly maturing its flavours and aromas in the darkness, unknown. I'm a puntner.vii

And then I explained what had happened, lo those many years ago : "It's a visual gag."

See ? It all makes sense, even if I had to suggest the answers to you.

Don't stop me now
I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball
Don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time
Just... gimme a call!
Don't stop me now
'Cause I'm having a good time
Don't stop me now
Yes I'm havin' a good time
And I don't want to stop at all!

  1. The girls are naked indoors, you realise. My "we were sitting around the table" is quite the fucking kitty show, lemme tell ya. []
  2. It's like the circus, the shit I came up with on the spur of the moment makes exactly no sense to anyone (myself included) ; let's just say that the sort of people who wouldn't find life comfortable in a "artist's den" of ye olde yurp or somesuch would probably be driven to madness. Then again that sort of stolid tedious mediocre fucks deserve their madness. []
  3. Someone (we're not gonna mention names or any such other indentifiables, to be fashionable like all the other people out there an' also "protect the privacy" of a buncha sluts playing with themselves naked at the table under pretext of "having dinner" en famille*) got me a pair of magnetized hematite, about the size&shape of boar balls (I mean, the balls you shoot the boar with, ending it thereby, not the balls he shoots the saw with, staring new boarlets therewith).

    * Une famille est une communauté d'individus réunis par des liens de parenté existant dans toutes les sociétés humaines -- selon l'anthropologue Claude Lévi-Strauss. []

  4. You know how women do, don't you ?

    Hm, I guess you don't,

    Well, what can I say ? []

  5. She looked pretty with magnet earring, too. []
  6. Two bucks for anal, what'd you call it ? []
  7. Which is a vintner that specializes in juicing puns. []
Category: Zsilnic
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2 Responses

  1. That last one was area of effect punning, yeesh.

  2. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Sunday, 23 February 2020

    These get even better on the re-read!

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