I'm not sure I can truly convey the lulz...

Thursday, 05 February, Year 7 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu

... but I can certainly try.

doesnt-want-tribute

So : a teacher (who isn't ever going to make enough money to pay the rent - while spending a TON of time "working", in one of the highest risk environmentsi on planet US) ; a guy with no houseii (which in the US means pooriii ) ; a derpy looking adolescent ; a guy that "doesn't want tribute but honesty" ; a guy from Herdenssonville, NC ; a guy who has no other picture of himself than one in which there's also a girl which was cut off (minus some of the hair) ; an apologetic beta maleiv and a great sense of humor, caring guy looking for a loving relationship all sign up for a website where poor Indonesian adolescents (who also don't own a house) try to pass themselves off as women on the strength of nudies stolen off teh webs, for the benefit of poor white men over fifty who pretend like they're rich because they live in [what used to be] a rich country (much like they pretend they're healthy&successful because "their" sports team won).

With me so far ? Good! So these guys all tell the same joke. It goes something like "Here I am".

Did you laugh ?

If you didn't laugh you will never be a writer.

———
  1. Teachers interact with a large number of children at that dubious time in human development called puberty. Puberty always and everywhere manifests in the same tropes ; these just happen to be the highest crime the US knows, on account of "quick, pick something to scapegoat so we don't notice the shit we're in" and "fucking kids" coming up. By comparison, digging up uranium or flying to the Moon are activities involving much less risk - and compensation in case of undesirable occurences. Teaching however - much like participating in illegal racing with stolen police cars while drunk - carries a fine in case of undesirable occurences. You have to be a particular sort of estrogen-addled cuckold to pick teaching over drunk racing cop cars, in this context. []
  2. Or what else would "willing to relocate" mean ? []
  3. Because as far as everyone knows - including people who actually know quite a lot - the only pretense to wealth of your average US citizen is based on his "home equity", which is obviously a number that is all but set by the central planning commission of the US Fed. Think about it, "saving in house" is not merely giving your government the power to inflate away your savings, but with it the twin power of simply melting away the "equity value" as it sees fit. Quick, find further painful bits to put in the tiger's mouth! []
  4. If that classification annoys you, ask me more about it - I promise I will spit in your drink. []
Category: Rautati si Mizerii
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2 Responses

  1. Quick, find further painful bits to put in the tiger's mouth!

    Let's see now, we've got RRSP/RESP/TFSA/IRA, savings accounts, government bonds, any fiat stock exchange... and the list goes on until the tiger's mouth is so full that it might just bite something off quite unintentionally. Oops.

  2. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    2
    Mircea Popescu 
    Thursday, 5 February 2015

    I suppose the correct question to ask would be "what exactly isn't in the lion's mouth", also known as Alf's Despair.

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