Female Trouble

John Waters' offeringⁱ has, over any other film you may have watched or may have liked in the period, an undisputable advantage. The advantage is that when females struggle around the erect penis, some end on their backs, and when struggling females end up on their backs there's cunts in plain display. These are facts of life, indisputable. That some cultural constructs fail to handle some facts of life leaves them short and ugly, the direct equivalents of Windows - inept, useless, unappealing. Even if they have other features which you may have liked.

The entire film is constructed as a direct counter to mainstream culture, which is not exceptional for Waters. Moreso than in any other film of his, however, certainly moreso than in Pink Flamingos for instance, this dialogue is consistent and productive. Yes, the things you believe and center your life around come out with two black eyes and (deservedly) as laughingstocks. This is because that's what they are - scarcely a reason to dislike the messenger, so to speak.

Here, get a load of this phone conversation :

Is Earl Peterson there? This is Dawn Davenport. Dawn Davenport. You made love to me Christmas morning.ⁱⁱ Well, I just wanted to tell you... that I'm pregnant. And I want money.

You stole my wallet, you fat bitch!ⁱⁱⁱ

So what if I did? I want money.

You'll never get any money from me, cow.^iv Just 'cause you got them big udders don't mean you're somethin' special. Get the hook. Go fuck yourself for all I care. Yeah! Go fuck yourself!

It isn't... what isn't it. Is it not truthful ? Is it not proper ? Is it not how what, how you feel ? How everyone ever feels ? How most everyone mostly feels ?

There's a lot your mommy never told you, and only part of it is about Christmas. You'll find it here, if you know where to look, if you can read, if you're not entirely a vapid idiot. That's what art is, and that's what's important in the world. By comparison, fifty thousand other films Hollywood churned out in that decade scarcely register.

1. Female Trouble, 1974, by John Waters with the usual suspects. [↩]
2. She had run away from home after trampling her parent's gifts because no cha-cha heels. Classic hitch hiker fuck, complete with the strategically placed matresses. Oh, what you know of what you've missed of the original route 66. [↩]
3. How did ~you~ think she knew the name ? Ah, what you don't know about how to be a tramp... there's a lot of life out there, baby. [↩]
4. You think she should ? Cow ? [↩]