Cunt size discussion. This is guaranteed to be weird.

Sunday, 30 March, Year 6 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu

Cat How are you!
Chick Well I just woke up! But otherwise good.

Cat Gmorning!
Chick Fun post ;) Morning!

Cat You know mah cock does not actually fit in your cunt wholly ? :D
Chick Lol okay I believe you I belieeeeve you.

Cat But aren't you getting short vagina worriedi ?
Chick No.

Cat How come!
Chick I forgot about it after you said you were kidding the second time.

Cat Well, it is factually correct. There's about an inch leftover, you saw it. It fails to make any possibly conceivable difference, except for this : it puts the penis length thing in complete fucking perspective!
Chick How's that?

Cat Honey, I dunno how many times I got laid. Musta been thousands. This BEFORE I fucking noticed that a portion of my cock somewhere at the base is currently never getting to go in, and perhaps never has. Not that I'd know. Nor would it care. Meanwhile there's people out there rubbing their cock with rulers and lined paper derping about how they can't function socially because they don't have that extra bit ?
Chick But that has nothing to do with having sex and everything to do with comparing themselves to other... "men".

Cat But they may as well compare the length of their toenails! I don't stick my toenails in your snatch, either. Well... not most of the time.
Chick I was gonna say ;p

Cat In fact! HERE IT IS! My toenails are more of a penis than that last inch.
Chick Lol.

Cat I think it must be psychological. Like so : if there's some you can't fit, then they feel ok with the situation. But if you put the whole thing away it feels like they got swallowed whole and may fall in!
Chick Fall in?!

Cat Yes.
Chick What, like a cunt's a magic portal to the vaccuum of space?!

Cat Yes. Life and death etc.
Chick Are you saying plenty of males are actually afraid of cunts then?

Cat Yes. Not even a novel concept, Freud invented it.
Chick Yeah but I never took it literally...

Cat It is literal. Little girls are instinctively afraid of penises, for as long as they're sexually immature. They do outgrow it. Boys however... they never do. They don't have the mechanisms.
Chick Seems odd to me.

Cat It is odd, definitely.
Chick As a little girl I'm sure I was afraid of various silly things (I was even afraid of a bowl of macaroni and cheese once), but not penises. I remember being curious, but nothing like afraid.

Cat Didja have one shoved in your face ? When you were like 5 ?
Chick Lol no. I watched my dad pee tho'...

Cat Well, suppose a baby elephant shoved his trunklet in your nose to check you out. Cry and run screaming ?
Chick Wait, IN my nose?

Cat Well sorta derpy on your nose.
Chick That's a hard call.

Cat Obviously it wouldn't fit, HIS NOSE IS BIGGER THAN YOUR NOSE.
Chick Well yeah but one never knoes when you propose a nose hose.

Cat Haha. Check this out : we were about 10 yo and with a school visit at Zoo in next town over. They had baby elephant. Baby elephant kinda quietly and sadly checked kids out from a distance. Eventually decided to try this outii ? Maybe it's not so bad ? Shoved its trunklet into boy's face to sniff him. Boy bit the elephant's trunk! Right on teh tip!
Chick Oh no!

Cat Baby elephant cried and went to his spot.
Chick Why so mean?!

Cat Well I dunno, boy got scared I guess...
Chick Aww ;/

Cat It was a panic thing I imagine.
Chick This is too sad.

Cat It was VERY sad. And the little thing looked incredibly sad too.
Chick ;/

Cat I spent the rest of the week bugging my parents to buy me the elephant.
Chick Awww!

Cat "But where would he stay!" "In the basement!"
Chick Lol.

Cat "Elephants don't like it in the basement!" "Well they DONT LIKE IT AT THAT ZOO EITHER!". Then two hours of point to point comparisons of Zoo and basement. (They really were not that different).
Chick Awww.

Cat "But it will be too expensive. Would you not rather have a X for your bday ?" "No. Elephant is fine." "But we can't afford it!" "Let's go steal it then ? Nobody's guarding it I checked." "We can't go stealing elephants" "What sort of people are you!"
Chick Ahaha.

So anyway. Penis length actually carries no importance. Until you fall in, that is.

———
  1. See Oglaf's Good Behaviour slides 1 & 2. []
  2. Here's an illustration :

    baby-elephant-changes-his-mind-after-sizing-up-the-enemys-roar []

Category: Zsilnic
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