Let's make it one giant puzzle!

Someone posted a link to that thread celebrating SA's love of butt, coin and buttcoin on #bitcoin-assetc. I was under the impression that SA is sort of like Trilema, a paid venue. Turns out that's not the case, so one

for i in {1..370}; do curl -L "http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3486823&userid=0&perpage=100&pagenumber=$i" >> buttbois.txt; done

later I was basking in the glory of 10 megabytesⁱ give or take (mostly give). It's incredible how much effort goes into commenting bitcoin, I'm not even sure there's that much text in the blockchain.

At any rate, in ever loving memory of that grandiose thing which was Buttcoinica, let's make this article one giant puzzle. I'll quote bits and your job is to identify either the author (if the quoted text is in the first person) or the subject (if the quoted text is in the third person). You're not allowed to google because google is downloading communism.

Puzzle piece #1.

I'm actually developing a new respect for that dude. He's so insufferable that I used to avoid reading anything he wrote but I've been reading his blog a bit lately and the man may be arrogant but he's not stupid. He thinks strategically and it will be kind of interesting to watch him go up against the self-appointed "big players" in the world of Bitcoin commerce. The prospect of seeing someone wipe the floor with Charlie Shrem and Roger Ver is pretty appealing.

Puzzle piece #2.

Coincidentally, my office was, literally, across the street from the registered address of BFL at the time. It turned out to be an apartment complex, as BFL was a start up and did not have an actual office at the time.ⁱⁱ

Puzzle piece #3.

I bet it's because of that guy (girl?). A lot of people over there hate them for some reason that always reeks of some sort of misogynistic/xenophobic "girls/foreigns can't possibly understand high finance " thing.

I may be missing something but he/she seems to be trying to do things like a grown up but can't with everyone acting like little kids. But I'm sure he/she has their own issues otherwise why are they involved in Bitcoins?

Puzzle piece #4.

I'm not saying I'm the best judge of character on the planet, but I'm pretty good at scam detection and after meeting the staff and seeing the hardware, I was cautiously optimistic that there was something special here. The night I met them, I also talked to Nassir via Skype about technical details, which lended further credence to the legitimacy.

Puzzle piece #5.

So, and I know it's been pointed out before but I'm going to labour the point, one of the most apparently reasonable, intelligent people over there (excl. the whole bitcoin thing) is maligned by the true believers simply because she's female. Yikes.

Puzzle piece #6.

X must be off his meds again. He's trying to claim that MPOE-PR is this person.

That person is 20+ years older, in the US, and (inexplicably) making bank as a "spiritual advisor" to gullibles. X is an Olympian of incompetence.

That's about all, it got boring. First person to correctly identify all 6 gets a Bitcoin. Cheerios.

1. Incidentally, what does sed -e :a -e 's/<[^>]*>//g;/</N;//ba' do ? [↩]
2. Much unlike the author, who did have a lot of money from working for most of the major banks TKBing 24/7, and also lived close by but OUTSIDE the projects, just this side of the train tracks. Just FYI, at the time. [↩]