The eggers
"Hey can I ask you a question ?"
"Ok"
"What's with all the chicken pics ?"
"Wut"
"Everyone on insta is like doing nothing but little chicken pictures what is that ??"
"You mean you don't know ?"
"Know what"
"OMG Alison! Those are hatchlings babe!"
"I mean... I can see that..."
"No, no. Holy shit I can't believe no one told you yet. It's their hatchlings, girlfriend."
"What ?"
"You seriously don't know ?"
"Nope. I have no friends and #OOTL... :(...."
"Crazy"
"So are you telling me already ???"
"About the hatchlings ?"
"Yes about them! Jesus!!!"
"I can't, babe."
"Why not ?"
"It's a secret."
"OMGGGGggg"
"I can't tell you online."
"Starbucks by Macy's ? :))) ???"
"Ok..."
"Brt!"
"OK, are you ready ?"
"Ummm..."
"Just don't panic ok ? Give me your hand."
"Hey!"
"You want to know or don't you ?"
"Yeah... but... I mean... wow. What the hell ?"
"Nine days."
"You mean..."
"Yep."
"But... uh. How long does it take ?"
"Three weeks, more or less. You put it in the day after your period."
"You mean period-period ?"
"What, don't tell me you're still on Qlaira ?"
"Uh-huh. Haven't had one since I don't remember when."
"Just how out of the loop are you Alison ?! That is so like... 2015 or something!"
"Really ?"
"Fo' sho' girlfriend. These days you've got to bleed, honey. You just have to."
"But... why ?"
"I don't know. It's what's done."
"Ok, and you..."
"You put it in the day after. Then if everything goes well a day or two before the next one you feel it coming out."
"You mean... you can feel it ?!"
"Of course you can feel it. It pecks at the shell and everything!"
"Wow."
"Yeah. Let me tell you, it's the greatest feeling in the world."
"That's incredible."
"You're supposed to sit or something when you feel the first peck. Standing's not good. Squatting or like yoga cow not good either."
"How come ?"
"Well, if you stand it's going to fall down and it hurts itself."
"No panties ?"
"Of course not. Jesus Alison! you're not supposed to put anything on while hatching."
"Not even jeans ?"
"Nothing! Only skirts. And no stockings. Except if you have the fancy ones with the belt, that don't cover anything."
"How come ?"
"Well... I don't know. It needs to breathe I guess. Plus you show people."
"Ha."
"Yep."
"So... nothing at all ? I mean like, ever ?"
"Nothing ever. It has to be in the air all the time. And when it comes out you want to point kinda downwards but up close and at like the bed, so it can't fall and doesn't have to climb because it can't really. And squatting is bad because it tenses up your vag muscles. You have to relax when it comes out."
"Oh wow. You don't push ?"
"No, no, you just let it be. So you can feel it crawl out of you."
"Literally ?!"
"Literally! It crawls out, you can feel its little baby claws and everything."
"Wow. That's... that's incredible."
"It is! You totally have to try it. It's the greatest feeling."
"But... I mean, what do you do afterwards ?"
"You mean with the shell ? Nothing. You just rinse it out. Some people eat it though."
"What!"
"Yeah, like during their period. They say it helps with depression."
"Oh, really ?"
"I don't know, I never tried it. I was thinking maybe this time..."
"How many times have you done it ?"
"Oh like... forever. Since at least May I think. Or June."
"Wow."
"Yeah! It's addictive, for sure. Don't start because you won't be able to stop anymore."
"Haha, right. That's so stupid!"
"I'm telling you. I couldn't go on without it."
"That's just... but wait, what about Tyler ?"
"What about him ?"
"Did you break up ?"
"Nope. We're preparing for the aniversary!"
"Oh wow! Way to go Jess!"
"Yep, that's right. One year. Can you imagine ?"
"Nope. That's like... the record. It's gotta be."
"You'd think so, right? But no, all the hatchers are in LTRs."
"Really ?"
"Yup. For as long as you keep shelling they can't dump you."
"Are you serious ?"
"Totally. It's in the Constitution. Otherwise you go after them for chick support."
"Ahahahaha."
"But seriously, it's the best thing we ever did together."
"You did it together ?!"
"It was actually his idea, I had no clue about it. But he read it online somewhere."
"Oh wow. So you... he..."
"He puts them in me, yeppers. Though many people do it girls only."
"Like, with the fingers ?"
"No, there's a special strap-on. You lie down like with your ankles tied up to the bedpost and the other girl lays her egg into you."
"Wow. That actually... "
"... sounds pretty hot, huh!"
"Yeah it does. But I mean won't it break ?"
"No, they do it delicately. Plus it's special, the dong's like flared outside not like normal penis head but backwards."
"Oh. But wait... I mean do you..."
"You mean me and Tyler ?"
"Yeah."
"It changes things, you know."
"It does ?"
"Yeah, like, he can't get in anymore. There's no room for him now."
"Really ? I mean doesn't he... doesn't it break ?"
"Oh, no. No way. You have no idea how tough the little guy is. There's nothing a boy can do to it, his penis is never hard enough."
"Seriously ?"
"Absolutely. Once it's inside of you that's it. I mean he could break it with a screwdriver or something like that, I guess. But not with his dong, no way."
"That's incredible."
"It just doesn't get nearly tough enough. Not even close."
"So do you still..."
"Well I mean you know, when he puts it in I encourage him."
"How's that go ?"
"You whisper in his ear you know, little things, like about how it'll make it impossible for him to be inside and stuff like that."
"Does he like that ?"
"Are you kidding me ? He loves it!"
"Yeah, my last boyfriend..."
"That Kyle dude ?"
"Yeah... his fave thing was if I watched his weird porn at his desk, you know, one leg on the desk and rubbing myself, and maybe tug at his thing or slap his balls or something, but not cummies or anything real."
"All black dudes and cucks and stuff ?"
"Exactly."
"They're all like that."
"Tyler too ?"
"Definitely. His top thing is trying to fuck me while I'm egged, because he can't get even half way inside. Just the tip like, for real."
"Do you... I mean ?"
"Oh totally, I humiliate the shit out of him."
"Strap on too ?"
"Sometimes. I mean, he ordered one online pretending it's for me, right, like so I can be girl egged ? But it was obviously not because the head's not right. So I confronted him and he admited he's a little bitch boy who loves taking it in the butt."
"Jess ? Are you getting excited ?"
"I gues a little haha."
"So can I have one too ?"
"What, seriously ?"
"I want to try it out."
"First you'll have to quit that pill shit though."
"Consider it done."
"Then the day after you stop bleeding..."
"Will you put it in me ?"
"What, me ?!"
"Please, Jess. I'm begging you, please. I really want your egg growing inside of me."
"I... but I mean, I've never done it to a girl before."
"Me either. Please, I'll do anything. I'll be like your maid ok ?"
"I don't know, Alison... what if we break it ?"
"You said yourself..."
"And you'll do everything I tell you to ?"
"Anything, yes. Please!"
"That's kinda cool... Honestly I wish it was a girl done it to me, too. It makes you feel so good and obedient to be egged... you just want to worship the living shit out of whoever it is that does it to you."
"Just thinking about it..."
"Actually... you know, we were kinda looking for a room mate."
"I thought you were in one bedroom ?"
"Well yeah. But it's a really big bed. Like Queen size."
"So it'd be me, you and Tyler in it ?"
"Oh, no. Tyler doesn't sleep in the bed. He's in a sleeping bag in the hallway."
"A, really ? How come ?"
"Just how out of the loop are you ? #nBiB babe!"
"What's that ?"
"No boys in bed. They really don't belong there. It's not good for them. Or for the bed."
"Wow. That's such a great idea!"
"I know, right ?"
"So we'd sleep together ?"
"Well yeah... but you'll still be my maid ok ?"
"Sure ma'am!"
"Hahaha. Oh wow, I'm glad we talked. This can be so much fun!"
"Jesus. A double mocha in a paper cup changed my life. I'm keeping this cup!"
"And we're gonna drink each other's pee. You up for that ?"
"What ?!"
"If we do, our periods will get in sync. Then we'll hatch together."
"Wow. Is that real ?"
"I don't know. I think so. It's on mikipedo."
"Then it's real."
"Will you do it ?"
"I'll... I'll do it if you do it."
"Hell yeah!"
"You ever done it before ?"
"Nope..."
"I wonder what it tastes like..."
"Let's get out of here!"