La Ragazza Che Sapeva Troppo

La Ragazza Che Sapeva Troppoⁱ is a kinda-sorta nothing in particular. Broadly regarded as the first giallo (though the link is superficial at best), it's a romantic comedy trying to do Hitchcock and Gaslight at the same time. The result's neither arousing, amusing nor afrightin', but more like a comestible domestic failure. What'd happen if your fiance attempted to make strawberry shortcake, Blackforest cake and baked Alaska in the same pan ? And... would you still eat it ?

It makes entirely no sense, in the 70s porno sense of "makes no sense"ⁱⁱ ; it's shot in black-and-white (the director's supposedly famous for his excellent use of color) ; it utterly fails to display the unremarkably unendowed chickies to any standard. There's just... pretty much nothing there.

I suppose the only reason to watch this thing is the same reason you'd opt to drive around in a Yugo : you're being Michael Cera.

1. 1963, by Mario Bava, with Leticia Roman, Valentina Cortese. "The Evil Eye" in the US & co, a terrible re-cut horrifyingly re-scored. Their period fixation with Les Baxter rescoring on Italian imports is sheer lunacy from a contemporary perspective. [↩]
2. In fairness, it includes a disclaimer as to this point within the first two minutes : the weird dude who waited until the plane was landing in Rome (ie, 16 hours) to interpelate the lone teenager sitting next to him, a strictly inconceivable circumstance (females being kept on as short a leash then as now, when's the last time you saw a solo teen flying transatlantic ?) offers her a cigarette which she doesn't want and besides she has her own except where's she put them oh no take the whole pack of 'em I don't mind. So she does. After which his next like isn't "well, try this buttplug with nipple clamps on for size then, if you're that fucking submissive why the hell not."

   Instead, he's arrested waiting in the customs line, by some dorks so utterly unprofessional they actually open up his double bottom briefcase to expose a buncha Kent "marijuana" cigarettes and what, does he use cocaine for borotalco ? [↩]