Suburra

Suburraⁱ is a sort of spaghetti Kill Bill.

It is notable because it gets the sex right : yes, that's exactly how powerful people fuck, as you well know : with a younger cunt in tow. That one licks the useless cunt of the other while that other is taking it up the ass is naturally normal and therefore necessary -- whatever you're doing instead is... well, you know... whatever lesser, unconvincing and unpalatable substitute you can afford can be mass produced for you.

Sadly, it doesn't get absolutely anything else right. I've not seen a "boss of Rome" as unconvincingly uncredible ever. The guy's a born CPA, let him the hell be. Nothing else makes any sense -- why's the "boss" shooting people personally, with his lumbering frame of tactical worthlessness ?! Why's the young lion suddenly stuck with the stupid ball ?! How come the "toxica"/precious cuntlet suddenly got moves, what, did god download kung-fu into her on a JIT basis ?! Who the hell does drugs like that, lawd's mercy, the heroin/cocaine depiction is exactly opposite of what anyone ever uses them for, what the shit backwards world is this where junk is an upper and crack a downer ?! Besideswhich, the scene where some "minorelle" takes one pipe hit and dies without as much as a whisper... what was this, footage originally intended for the Disney channel ? It really brings to mind those retarded PSAs from back in the 80s with the "wild teenagers" shooting each other in the face because they've hat a puff of pot.

The list could go on, but really, what's the purpose ? Watch it as far as the fucking and move on.ⁱⁱ

1. 2015, by nobody in particular, with Greta Scarano and Yulia Kolomiets. Proof :

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2. Incidentally, of all the wanna-be me's out there, this idiotic bureaucrat is taking some sort of cake, that's for sure. He doesn't as much as own a proper length windbreaker, what the fuck, if his driver gets the flu his life stops.

   I understand the remarkably tight circumstances (with the unconvincing veneer of abundance, luxury and pretense) are accurately descriptive of the sheer misery, the uncountable poverty of the sad exponents of this sadness that prefers calling itself "modern democracy" ; and I further understand the needs of visual representation drive this indefensible (if cheaply had) misrepresentation of them as me. Nevertheless, the beast of ridicule and unintentional comedy is cracking at the unseemly seams, it doesn't work, it doesn't stand and it absolutely doesn't live. You mean to tell me the man with an old whore dedicated enough as to train his young cunts for him will run away like a child in denial at the slightest whiff of trouble ?! He's gonna ghost her, as if they just met, but until that moment he's gonna pretend like they've known each other forever and will continue to know each other forever ?! Puh-leaze. What the fuck works like this, besides the feverish imagination of adolescentine clods ? [↩]