So those idiots in France...

The french supreme court came up with a ruling forcing Amazon to only deliver "essential" items, off a (deliberately) intricate list of "rules" which are both byzantine in their complexity and moronic in their practical inutility.ⁱ

Since there's an attached fine, of no less than 100`000 euros per offence (meaning, each individual item shipped outside of the ordered list), it's obvious enough that the whole point of the entire exercise in harmful pretense to hallucinated sovereignity is making a little money. The french municipalityⁱⁱ is simply trying to steal some cash from Amazon and then call the stealing something else, that's all.

Amusinglyⁱⁱⁱ, the list manages to include self-obviously non-essential items, such as "IT products", while it fails to include presumably essential items, such as... catfood. The necessary (if "completely unpredictable") result will be a lot of pantsuits crying their every waking hour to their coworkers^iv over their "work communication kits" about stiff Mitzi locked in the only bathroom of the "efficiency" pantsuit storage unit, and about how they're pissing into cups now, because they can't go in there and face the corpse of their substitute husband, and about how they're running out of cups.^v

Be all that nonsense as it may, were I Bezos I'd absolutely order all shipments to france halted^vi, explaining that years of political instability have rendered the rule of law a factual impossibility in france, which is now for all practical business purposes below Senegal or Algeria or whatever, and let the government deal with the fallout. Specifically -- let them go beg the Germans to vouch for them that indeed they're a legitimate state rather than a self-obvious joke, which hopefully will be done for pay^vii. Let them take over the business to "run it themselves", exactly into the ground they've run all the others, then come back in a few years with well established precedent, just in case the usual suspects have the usual bullshit to bring before the "supreme court" again. "Here you useless muppets, here's what happened last time you tried this". Not that it'd do so much, pointless&witless never learn, but at least it'd be funny.

He's not going to do anything like that, of course, he's way too old to still be able to summon the balls to play hardball anymore. Nevertheless, I daresay it's what should be done. Wouldn't you say ?

1. Meaning, given the list and an item, you can't reliably predict whether it's included or excluded. [↩]
2. No, there's no such thing as a french state, lay off the pipe already. [↩]
3. It's amusing from some perspectives, but I expect it's rather typical from other perspectives -- the dividing line being the same as always. [↩]
4. As these pointless morons don't have any friends, the coworkers are co-opted in the role. Much like nine year olds live, you know, they have neither the resources (nor, properly speaking, the need) to obtain actual friends, so the other kids arbitrarily going to the same school at the same time are co-opted into the role. [↩]
5. Do you suppose they'll water their house plants with it, by the way ? I mean, after all, it's got electrolytes... [↩]
6. I don't just mean Amazon france, I mean all of them, none of this "we'll order catfood off amazon.de hurr" bullshit. [↩]
7. The Brits ain't doing it for love or money, that's for damn sure. Remember that caricature ?

   

   Let the stupid old whore pay her way, what, is she special ? Let her pay her way, and let it cost her five times what it costs anyone else. [↩]