The Amorous Adventures of Moll Flanders

The Amorous Adventures of Moll Flandersⁱ is a film ahead of its time, in the sense that it looks and feels incredibly '70s while it was actually made mid-60s. This isn't a good thing.

It's remarkable because it has the celebrated director actingⁱⁱ somewhat after everyone agreed his (directing) career was rather over. You look into his eyes and you wonder... what is perhaps going on in his mind ? In this vein it's much more of an accomplishment than say Fellini's deliberate attempt (and unreviewable failure) to reconstruct the "thoughts" of such a man (in Dolce Vita).

It's somewhat promising because it has Sanders reading, and who ever had a better voice than George Sanders ?

It's still not worth watching though. The dumb cunt's not even topless, and the constant "joke" of cvasi-coitus pseudo-interruptus has all the comedic chops historically associated with the forays into humor of the developmentally delayed.

The whole thing has to be re-done, to include a stark-naked replacement for Claire Uflandⁱⁱⁱ, and you can take it from there.

1. 1965, by Terence Young, with Vittorio De Sica, George Sanders, Kim Novak. [↩]
2. Which is technically common, he has over a hundred screen acting credits to his name, leaving aside how he spent the 20s owning Rudolph Valentino in Italian cabarets ; but practically rare, as he mostly played bit parts and principally in shockingly unremarkable films, like is the case here. [↩]
3. The eight year old with pretty eyes playing young Moll.

   

   Pretty decent call on the part of the casting agent, by the way, as it turns out she did grow up into something vaguely resembling Kim Novak.

   She went by Claire McAlpine at the time of her suicide (1971, she was ~15). She left behind a (studiously unpublished, because fucktards) diary discussing the various people who had sexually used her to date ; according to the old cunt lobby pretty much everyone in show business had fucked her by that time -- and yet the whole rotten lot of the idiots failed to as much as film her bare cunt, if you can believe this unspeakably dumb shit! Their loyalties lay with the female wail special interest group or what the fuck nonsense is this! How about more filming and less raping, and in general more speech and less wank, more plain clarity and less elaborate pretense, and so following ? Hm ? Stop tolerating the coy behaviour, it's unseemly on the face and it breeds everything that's wrong with the world underneath that face. Just say no to dumb cunts, how fucking hard is it ?!

   Buncha retarded wankers... There they sit, these people, fucking eight year old girls when they shouldn't, and not filming them when they should. What the fuck ?! [↩]