The Miracle Of The Bells
A Conclave Of Terrible Hamsi (inexplicably released as "The Miracle Of The Bells" in some markets entirely foreign to taste, experience or any sort of sense) absolutely sets new USDA cinematic standards. You've not seen ham like the "press agent" talking to the "doctor" since the days of Turducken!
On top of all of which, the script's so bad it puts David Mamet's impossible nonsense to shame!
There's absolutely no reason anyone could have to see this thing. I did see it ; but that's because I'm not all there. Save yourself some time, save yourself whatever shreds of sanity -- do something else for an hour.
———- 1948, by Hormel, with that terrible ham from Double Indemnity (the original, terrible version thereof). Plus a (slighty) singing' (and very very hammy) Sinatra. Plus some chick that utterly can't act (Baroness Altenburger von Mackenstein-Frauenberg, what can ya ask) trying to pretend she's an actress acting well the role of an actress acting well... The whole thing's a boat of failboats piling into each other.
PS. Stupid bitch was terrible in Senso, too, though that steaming pile of pretentious shit would have been just as terrible with or without her. In fact, given the deep idiocy of everything about it, nude dancin' Rosalys'd not have likely fixed anything. [↩]
