Birth

Birthⁱ tells the story of an adult woman that falls in love with a little boy, over on Cunt Planet.ⁱⁱ

So almighty is the suction power of her vaginal void (empowered, of course, by the green Sun of Cunt Planet) that she ends up playing naked in the bath with him, and in all seriousness discussing the little boy's "supporting her" (he actually says "I'll get a job", because apparently "I'll turn you out, ho!" was busy that evening or something). And whether he has any previous sexual experience - which he hasn't, which is all the better.

In this scandalous absurdity of a film, the man exists strictly as a reimplementation of Mr. Fabulousⁱⁱⁱ, and the woman, after having betrayed and greviously insulted the flags of her fiance, produces the following apology :

What happened to me was not my fault. There's no way I could've behaved any differently, you know. What I did... wasn't my fault. What happened to me wasn't my fault, and I can't be held accountable for it. There's no way I could ever have said to him... "Go away." I couldn't do it. It was a mistake. And... I'm sorry. I'm... But I wanna be with you. I wanna be with you. Yes, I do. And I wanna get married. And... I wanna have a good life, and I wanna be happy. That's all I want. Peace.

And he accepts this abominable atrocity, because on Planet Cunt that's what he does. "I'm going to take out your right eye, so you always remember not to stand on any other side for as long as I have a single flag up" was busy that evening, or something.

She's not alone, in the insanity, the matriarch of the clan of idiots has the unmitigated audacity to discuss whether she liked or didn't like the Avatar, as if this could matter in any sort of view or context for crying out loud already. Lauren Bacall is very convincing in the role, but that doesn't make the role less idealistic^iv.

Ironically, the Avatar's actual life was with Anne Heche's poorer, simpler, weaker character ; and the boy also moves on. This leaves very little trace on Cunt Planet however, because other than being forever trapped in a subconscious state of softly dreaming, the denizens are also bereft of the gift of memory, and structurally incapable of reflexion^v.

There's nothing much to see here, unless you're into idiotomology.

1. 2004, by Jonathan Glazer, with Nicole Kidman, Lauren Bacall, Anne Heche. [↩]
2. Cunt Planet is this alternative reconstruction of the world where women actually matter - not as accessory items but as the pulse and structure of the Universe. Ridiculous, I know, but there's a reasonably large demo of emotionally stunted and developmentally retarded females that loves the shit, so what can you do. There's a demo for the "Action" genre, even. [↩]
3. A recurring trope in Cunt Planet fiction, Mr. Fabulous is a male most excellent in all topics and fields of male excellence, that nevertheless never enslaves the woman, nor beats her nor tortures her nor otherwise puts her in her proper place. For never explained reasons, love's not generally mentioned other than as a verbal fetish.

   It's exactly the fetishized "alternative parent" emotionally stunted and developmentally retarded females would fixate on, part and parcel of their retreat in daydreaming as an alternative to life. [↩]

4. Ie, the opposite of realistic. [↩]
5. They do an idle, psychotic spinning instead, a sort of rumination not unlike what passes for prayer in the far East. [↩]