Булучеало, Buluk-Ayres

The ever-vigilant entertainment officerⁱ spotted the notice hidden somewhere in the middle pages of the local fishwrap : there's an "International Tango Championship" brewing!

This is remarkable enough for a city in which dancing just got forbidden by judicial fiat,ⁱⁱ so we go check it out. Here you go :

Yeah, that's right. It's not a boliche, or a bar or a club or anything of the sort. It's a "centro cultural"ⁱⁱⁱ, about the size of a suburban garage. Did you want more ? Sure, why the hell not.

Think you've died and went to social services heaven. Absolutely no way to distinguish between this horror and a Medicare-powered Senior Citizen Care Facility whatsoever. A bunch of short, marginally maybe not ugly women apparently thinking themselves hot shit, a bunch of elderly dudes with a hobby. That's it and that's all.

O, no, that's not all. Let's be fair. There's also a bar!

Oh, and a cat! Which, in absolute fairness, was by far the most intelligent local present.

To beautifully sum up this whole adventure,

And since we're on the topic, let's go to the beach. They can't get indoors right for the life of them, it must be due to the fundamental nature of the subhuman, which is what they are. They probably don't feel comfortable indoors, as close to the monkey as they still find themselves, you might think. Probably the beaches are great. Fine! Join me for a walk down the geographic equivalent of Pacific Beach Pier, if you're familiar with San Diego at all :

Oh, maybe I'm cheating by looking the wrong way, huh. Alright, let's look the other way as well!

Miles upon endless miles of prime beachfront real estate in the fucking city, used as open door toilets and garbage dumps. Now sit right there where you're sitting and tell me about how Argentines aren't retarded, one and all to the last man. Tell me they're civilised, tell me they're people, tell me they belong in this world. Tell me, like a fucktard by the name Facundo Manes, that there's such a thing as a "cerebro Argentino", some sort of "manera de pensar, dialogar y hacer un pais mejor". Try it, let's see what happens.

Meanwhile, here's the real Argentina :

Count them with me : onetwothreefourfivesixseven EIGHT! Eight identical fliers, all stuck into the same newspaper. Because the people printing "newspapers" would like to pretend like they're printing newspapers ; and the "people" doing "marketing" would like to pretend like they're people, and doing marketing. So what if it's all cargo cultism, ridiculous to the hilt ? So what if nobody's ever going to in any sense react or even see their garbage ? Nobody's measuring anything! Because the "person" that should be measuring, alongside with the derp that should be marketeering and the derp that should be newspapering can much rather all agree to produce fiction jointly and that's that! Argentina is also a country! With newspapers, and clubs and people in it! Mooooo!

Here's the true face of this country place :

Here's what the herd is really all about :

En nombre de nadie, that part they got. Beneficio de todos ? Yeah, sure, todos los tontos. What beneficio ? Here's the beneficio :

There, exactly depicted above, Argentina today. The same Argentina that was, a century ago, a major world power, maybe 4th, maybe 5th. Certainly above Russia under the Tsar. Argentina was a first world country back when most of Europe was a third world country, before Italy, before Spain, before Ireland and Greece and all the junk, Argentina.

Then they made the indescriptably idiotic choice of giving old women a voice ; and once they started taking in the poison that always and everywhere flows liberally from the lips of the witches, socialism followed, and disaster soon thereafter, and ceaselessly hence. Slow motion, slow acting, depressing decay. But they won't learn the lessons, fifty, a hundred, a hundred and fifty years later they still won't accept they've made a mistake, they won't admit nobody asked the hags, they won't fix the problem and so no, they've no future. The retards never do.

1. To quote,

   No, she didn't, she couldn't have had, to have fun you need to organize it, and who was to organize it for her?

   [↩]

2. I kid you not : a derp by the name Roberto Gallardo issued an order that forbids "all dancing activities in a commercial space to either live or recorded music anywhere in the city of Buenos Aires, irrespective of the type of registration or kind of permit the activity in question may fall under", to satisfy the same derpy ONGs / old women wailing that managed to prohibit smoking a few years ago.

   You think I'm kidding ? I'm not fucking kidding.

   This entire town populated by ten to twenty million mouthbreathers ; this entire town where they have "night life" according to their own clueless guess, except the total surface available for such activities barely equals the surface available per capita in the civilised world (ie, in Berlin, 200 sqm per capita, in Buenos Aires, 200 sqm total) ; this entire town where women under twenty go around mostly with their mothers and the bars are mostly filled by old women drinking coffees as if they may fucking exist in the public space, and the fucking yellow pages list clubs as a "restaurants/clubs" joint heading as if this is either conceivable or permissible ; this entire town of losers discovered the hard way that if you make it really really hard for people to open places where kids can party then the kids will crowd, and if the kids crowd some kids will die has also come up with the solution! Close the whole thing down! Because clearly it's bad, and old women don't understand exactly why there must be young sluts naked under streams of liquor already!

   I give myself 1 in 3 odds of witnessing a babaciune holocaust in Argentina. Literally, old people whipped to death and piled up in mass graves for the only fault of being old. And fucking obnoxious. I'd like that. [↩]

3. El Espacio Cultural Resurgimiento ofrece variados talleres y actividades para todas las edades, como así también una vasta oferta de programación de su sala de espectáculos como los Ciclos de Música, Teatro infantil y para adultos, entre otros.

   Centro Cultural Resurgimiento - Gral. José Gervasio Artigas 2262 [↩]