Mika Epstein aka Ipstenu is a thoroughly clueless poser

Thursday, 01 January, Year 7 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu

Check out this thread on the "code is poetry" shitpile support forum :


As you can see, the noob does a superb job of asking the question, he is specific, he even quotes code for chrissakes. So what could possibly go wrong ?

Everything, of course. Because meanwhile, through the general gmaxwellization of IT aptly described by Naggum, we're stuck with idiots who have absolutely no clue, of anything, giving "answers" as if they had an inkling of a clue. Which they don't. Because they're in no way programmers, or coders, or developers or anything else worthy of any shred of respect. They're simply the guys that weren't good enough to sling dope, and I can scarcely see why the refuse of midtown gangland, the kids too stupid to be accepted in the Bloods or the Crips or whatever their local version is called should receive even the slightest shred of respect on the Internet. They may receive plenty of attention, sure, but it should universally be of this kind : Mika Epstein, you're too stupid to live, baby. Go do something about it.

The funny part, of course, is that the clueless poseur is a clueless pouseur to the hilt. From his contact page :

Rates & Availability

I’m also not available for contract work. In fact, right now I’m not available for hire at all. I have a full time job that involves what you’d normally consider consultant work, so I’m busy.

When I am for hire, I use set rates (not hourly) per task, based on current going rates for WordPress and support. I do not design themes (though I can fix them). Dehacking a site will always start at $100. The only real exceptions to this are people who I would let sleep over at my house, or fan-charity work. They always get insanely discounted rates.

Please don’t ask if I’m available at this time, the answer is no and I’ll just delete your email.

Really ? GTFO. I'd nuke your site off the Internet using this inexistent exploit that "doesn't exist" because Matt doesn't want to fix for purely political reasonsi, except I'm pretty convinced nobody would notice. Meanwhile, try and do the math : if I have a list of 100s of thousands of brokenii Wordpress installs, and I direct each and every one of those to do "a curl" of your site - which I can, because the code shittery puts this power in my hand for no good reason, just so idiots like you can pretend to be involved without actually reading or comprehending anything - every second, is that 100k pps for as long as each individual website doesn't mind receiving 1 pps ? And if my list is really 1.7 mn, do I get a 1.7mn leverage out of my packet stream through this "code is poetry" approach to coding & poetry ?

Yeah, it's totally "like a curl". That's exactly the fucking problem.

What really gets my goat however are that those 1.7mn sites being all run by people exactly like that unfortunate Barefoot Bookworm guyiii, who isn't a programmer but then again says so, and who asks a good question but then gets a stupid, lazy answer from a stupid, lazy pseudoexpert faker. A stupid, lazy answer which he can't distinguish from good sense, for the very reason he's mentioned, and so he's stuck working on trust. Trust which is predicated on nothing whatsoever, other than fakery & poseurism, because they don't know what a WoT is - and all the fakers and the posers, with their massive vested interest in things staying exactly the way they are obviously do all they can on that score. They have "real world" WoTs don't you know, and it's not really needed, don't you know, because God help them should actual WoT mechanics take over the purely declarative "I wrote guru on my profile" approach to life.iv

This 1.7 million people who are paying for hosting and pouring their time and energy into some identifiable symbol on the very naive assumption that division of labour works, and that if they do their part other people will also do theirs. Then they wonder why nothing happens. You know, just like the millions upon untold millions labouring all over the "civilised world" under the fundamentally broken set of assumptions that their elected "representatives" are there to represent the public interest, not patent insanity ; and the bankers are in the business of preserving and increasing wealth, not burning it all down ; and policemen are in the business of keeping the peace not raping & shooting the peace dead, and so on and so forth.

World War Two was a terrible squander of industrial and above all human capital. It is altogether negligible a loss when compared with what's going on since the End of Civilisation, arbitrarily dated as September 11, 2001. And it's all the fault of Mika Epstein, a thoroughly clueless poser, and all the others just like him.

I blame you for it. And if I ever get my hands on you, I will also hang you for it. Have a nice 2015.

PS. It turns out this imbecile is not even a dude. Seriously, "women in tech" ? The more I see the less I like.

  1. Discussed under "the Mullenweg minority" over at Here's why we don't like how the world currently works. []
  2. Broken as in, any package to date. All of them. []
  3. Check that out, he gets a link! The poseur "expert" does not. Iiiincredible! []
  4. You really should read that woman's post by the way. The actual situation is like this : an overweight and otherwise unattractive middleaged woman with no marketable skills and two teenaged kids in tow got dumped by her husband because he wants to go fuck hotter women now, and maybe he'll take an interest in the kids at some point. Later. "When they grow up". The situation as she represents it is something to do with a very empowered woman who makes "products" (the usual Warrior Forum type garbage) and so on and so forth.

    Because yes, that's altogether her whole shtick : you're a woman, kinda depressed & down on your luck, hire her to help you, sorta like hubby'd hire a camwhore from Krivoy Rog to help him get off, 50 bux an hour or whatever it is. And she tells you about how utterly ruined her own life is, all the while pretending like everything's going great. If you're not smart enough to figure out what's going on you're amused worth 50 bux and that's that. If you are smart enough to figure out what's going on you think to yourself "well, if she can lie about her situation, then damn it so can I", and Middle America population increases by one. Because yes, lying about it is more productive than doing something about it. Because welfare state and "liquidity injections" and so on and so forth. Because, fundamentally, socialism distorts the marketplace to the point of unworkability.

    Which unworkability means... that it won't work! Obviously. But that's too far a point for Erin Pavlina, Mika Epstein and the rest of the maggots, feasting on the corpse of what was once a great world. []

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11 Responses

  1. benny vasquez`s avatar
    benny vasquez 
    Friday, 2 January 2015




    Also, super cool death threat.

  2. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Saturday, 3 January 2015

    Gotta get teh names right eh ? Thanks, fixed.

  3. I noticed the name, was waiting to see what happens next:D

  4. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Saturday, 3 January 2015

    I guess next happen complaints that "you only said that because sexism" and insistences that anyone would even fucking notice whether anyone's male or female if the she-wolves didn't go miles out of their way to be stupid.

  5. I wanted to see why do you think this issue is a big deal, and how it should allow huge attacks on any website.

    I've been discussing this with a colegue, and my approach on this is not very different from the one Ipstenu has (sorry).

    I mean, this kind of attack serve as proxying your CURL calls through another server (or several if you use the huge amount of sites running wordpress available), but it won't increase the bandwidth available to the attacker itself, because he would still need to run the CRONs himself to every site he wants to direct an attack to the victim.

    I totally agree with you on the fact that they should fix it, as it's not something very hard to fix, doesn't require lots of server resources, and won't affect user experience. It will just improve the software quality.

    BUT, i agree with the Ipstenu on the fact that it's not a huge threat to security.

    In my opinion, no smart attacker would use this method as some kind of "botnet" system.

    Please, correct me if i'm wrong. I'm not a security expert, but i'm eager to learn why this could be bigger than what i can see.

    I hope you don't start cursing me too now lol.

    PS: Before i learned about this being reported before, i reported this myself to WordPress via email (as they ask you to report security issues).

  6. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    Mircea Popescu 
    Monday, 16 March 2015

    Let's start with simple things. Who are you, and what makes you think what you're discussing with "a colleague" has any value or import ?

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