Last Tango in Paris

Sunday, 12 February, Year 4 d.Tr. | Author: Mircea Popescu

Yoyo :
Jerry: "He was not the summer you. Besides, you had a summer me. Whitey Fisk, the guy who snuck you into Last Tango in Paris."
George: "I made him up."
Jerry: "So you never saw Last Tango in Paris?"
George: "No."
Jerry: "Too bad. It was erotic."

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Filmuli e un fel de duplicat al Chiriasului, de pe alte pozitii si-n alte perspective. Primele scene sunt absolut identice si chiar e o idee buna sa vedeti cele doua filme intr-o sesiune dubla, de preferinta asta ultimul. Apropo de care chestie, cum de exista "meseria" de DJ da' nu exista meseria de Dirijor de Film ? Asta din urma ar avea mai mult sens.

Si da, este erotic. V-am includ o galerie, pentru edificare, de jur in jur.

Partea unde fata se bate cu baiatul de-i este "logodnic" fix sub un poster urias pe care scrie "Adoucissant incorpore"ii e de tot hazul. Partea unde fata se pregateste s-o ia in fund (cu unt!) si declara ca nu i-i frica da' poate ca-s ceva secrete de familie acolo ? e de toata dulceata. Si-asa mai departe, se gasesc scene grandioase-n filigran in filmul asta cit sa va ajunga zece ore, poate chiar o zi intreaga.

Maria Schneider e o pustoaica de douazeci de ani abia impliniti in 1972 care nu stie sa plinga. E de inteles pina la urma, la virsta aia. Stie in schimb sa isi joace ingenuu ingenuitatea si autentic mirarea, recunosc femei reale-n jocul ei si deci putem spune ca-i talentata. Cinci ani mai tirziu urma sa joace Conchita in Obscure Object of Desire da' nu s-o inteles cu Bunuel pe teme filosofico-teoretice cit si "mars in bucatarie si fa-mi clatite" sau asa ceva. De fapt problema carierei ei fu asta, ca ea fiind usor lezbianca (spre rau de tot) si altfel destul de frumoasa, ba inca si mai grav un sex trophyiii.. mnoa. Lumea se astepta sa presteze. Ea n-o vrut sa presteze. Lumea atunci nu i-o dat roluri. Fin.

Brando e un fel de Bogart wannabe doar ca gheu si cu figuri de existentialism in cap. N-am idee daca exista actor mai prost in istoria filmului, nu in sensul ca nu joaca bine ci-n sensul propriu al acestui termen, e prost ca un lemn. Prin comparatie Stallone e un individ inteligent, un intelect rafinat, un subtil hermeneut al clarobscurului celuloid. Pe bune. Filmul asta era o minune cu Pacino, de exemplu, atit ca lui Pacino probabil nu-i dadea prin cap sa isi violeze partenera de filmari (scena cu untul... pai nu era-n scenariu, i-a venit asa spontan actorului, si fata zice ca de plins ea plinge pe bune).

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In tot cazul, Ultimul Tango la Paris e, alaturi de Salo, unul dintre putinele filme care s-ar putea folosi cu succes pentru a explica tinerilor nelumiti cam care-i treaba cu chestia asta secreta de-o fac adultii si-i zic futai iubire si-amor, pardon. Evident sunt fix filmele pe care toata lumea le evita, da' daca voi aveti impresia ca ei inteleg ceva din prostioarele alea "documentare" care li se baga pe git acuma sau ca le servesc la ceva...

PS. Adulti ?! Dar asta-i teribil!

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  1. Last Tango in Paris, 1972, de Bernardo Bertolucci, cu Marlon Brando si Maria Schneider []
  2. Indulcitor incorporat []
  3. Mai ales dupa filmul asta, despre care Esther Anderson, gagica lu' Brando la vremea ceea sustine c-a cam luat-o prin surprindere pe biata copila, in sensul ca scenele alea in care se plinge ca-i violata in film nu-s neaparat departe de realitatea experientelor actritei in raport cu filmul. Asa ca "Bertolucci is more of a gangster than a movie director. He's one of my enemies." []
Category: Trilematograf
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15 Responses

  1. M-a facut curios articolul tau, dar in special imaginile si modul tau de a exprima. Vreau sa te felicit, putini sunt cei care fac ca tine. Poate colaboram si in viitor, un parteneriat ceva cu blog-urile mele.

  2. Mircea Popescu`s avatar
    2
    Mircea Popescu 
    Tuesday, 9 July 2019

    We tried to watch this thing in the harem last night ; and ended up turning it off halfawy (right in the middle of the double sink bathroom scene, if you can believe that).

    It is fucking boring. I swear to god, it bored us all to tears.

    Other than that sad fate of "scandalously out-there 1970s sexuality", let it be stated that coincidentally we watched Rebel Without a Cause right after, and the coincidence made something obvious.

    Did you realise before Mr. Walking Potatohead's enunciation is a straight up attempt at copying James Dean's manner of speaking ? Much like an entire generation of talentless hacks posing as starlets tried to do Bacall, so is this untalented zombie tryna do James Dean!

    And he doesn't get it, at all, at bloody all, either. Listen to the two side by side and see! It's fucking out there.

    PS. It turns out that the best way to wake up a bedpile of sluts (you know how some kids get a large pile of plushies ? yeah ? well, mine are live girls) is by teabagging and cockslapping them in the face. Try it sometime! It's fun!

  1. [...] the right by its difference. Later in adolescence the struggle for the right thing often enough leads to blood and blows, or maybe experimentation with drugs, or running away from home, or what have you. The right thing [...]

  2. [...] de televiziune, si se vede. Nu-i probabil ca penibilu' de James Woods s-ar fi descurcat mai bine. Marlon Brando s-a descurcat mult mai prost in filmul al carui remake chestia asta de fapt este, cu toate [...]

  3. [...] ? Inca face filme, n-ati auzit de ea. Sa fie oare motivul ala perpetuu, acelasi pentru care Maria Schneideriii n-a ajuns nicaieri, acelasi pentru care Jessica Biel nu va ajunge nicaieri ? Cine [...]

  4. [...] Roba da ricchii is one of those made-for-tv productions that illustrate why European television was always much better than Americanii television. It really should be obvious from the above illustration (yes, this was aired before the watershed, seeing how Europe doesn't actually have this weird "watershed" thingee whatever it means), but if it isn't... hey, try Last Tango In Paris. [...]

  5. [...] is certainly one of the greatest films ever made. Yes, way up there with Cat On A Hot Tin Roof, Last Tango in Paris or Some Came [...]

  6. [...] gift with distractions - but that whitewash worked a fuckload of a lot better when he was raping Maria Schneider's juicy behindvi than it does here with all the bizarro hand gestures and body positionings. Diane [...]

  7. [...] don't tell me, pure and Platonic love, is it ? Funny, that's exactly what Mathieu says as well! [↩]Yes, I'm aware Lamers, Inc. purport to have taken over the terminology to [...]

  8. [...] delicious teen butt (in place of inept priss Maria Schneider, who was getting too old and had been assraped already anyway) and a bevy of low rent Penthouse starlets. [↩]Compare and contrast sanity as [...]

  9. [...] on film. Something was lost in terms of virility between the prior decade, going from Brando anally raping the teenager to this ketamine-fueled Applebee's version of reality ; the scab left behind where it used to live [...]

  10. [...] ; you perhaps recall the discussion of Ellen Barkin. You certainly recall the passing mention of Maria Schneider for (her absence in) Caligulaviii. There's more, including the current piece. The good news is that [...]

  11. [...] - 616 Drama 617 - 617 Bot (holy shit what the fuck is this, not even worth the mention! Either I've grown old or else 2014-era bait used to be utter shit) 618 - 644 Drama (very tenuously "Romanian whore words [...]

  12. [...] of comedy gold the Mary Sue angle presents... so, that stupid cunt Elizabeth Banks played the Maria Schneider card (without the excuse of actually having been raped on the set tho). You know, coy-ing all over [...]

  13. [...] if I recall (technically, porno, which isn't exactly the same thing, especially because all sort of unexpected matter counts) and comparatively little in the self-help "buns of steel" vein. Though come to think of it [...]

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