GTRL or GTFO.

The piece has all the markings of proper spamcopy. It starts with a general statement (first sentence) and then tries to hook the hawked crud into that general statement (second sentence). It speaks to the face in the crowd, not to an individual (second sentence). It promises as to the future (third sentence - second paragraph) and attempts to play on the fear of the face in the crowdⁱ (third sentence). It gives clear guidelines to action, because the face in the crowd is too mentally stunted to divine action from statements of fact (last sentence).

The only problem is that Get Real Usa Inc (GTRL:OTC US) is a typical pump and dump stock. What it does is

Get Real USA, Inc., through its subsidiaries, engages in the development, finance, sale, acquisition, distribution, and marketing of low-budget movies and content for streaming Internet media.

That business model lends itself well to the pump-and-dump but otherwise there's no money in it. The financial statements are a thing of wonder :

Currency in Millions of US Dollars	As of:	Apr 30 2011	Jul 31 2011	Oct 31 2011	Apr 30 2012
Selling General & Admin Expenses, Total		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
OTHER OPERATING EXPENSES, TOTAL		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
OPERATING INCOME		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
EBT, EXCLUDING UNUSUAL ITEMS		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
EBT, INCLUDING UNUSUAL ITEMS		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
Earnings from Continuing Operations		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
NET INCOME		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
NET INCOME TO COMMON INCLUDING EXTRA ITEMS		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0
NET INCOME TO COMMON EXCLUDING EXTRA ITEMS		0.0	0.0	0.0	0.0

Isn't that cute. The balance sheet looks a little better, in the sense that it's not full of zeros. It's full of red ink. Total equity "up" this year to -800k from -600k last year. The company has not actually made the news, but after a little digging you can come up with the principals :

• Francis X. Weber Jr. - Chief Executive Officer and President
• Gregory M. Walker - Consultant and Board of Advisors Member
• Dean Wright - Consultant and Board of Advisors Member

Pretty much the only hit worth the mention on the CEO is a 1992 case in which William M Joel, known professionally as Billy Joel, seeks to disentangle himself.

FACTS

In his complaint the entertainer Billy Joel (Joel) has asserted causes of action against Francis Weber and Frank Management, Inc. (FMI) seeking a judgment declaring valid the termination of an agreement under which FMI served as manager of Joel's business and personal affairs (the Agreement). Joel asserts such right based on his discovery in the latter part of 1989 that FMI, acting through Weber (its president and former sole shareholder), committed fraud in handling of his finances and breached its fiduciary duty to him. Weber, who has recently filed for bankruptcy, is the brother of Joel's former wife.

It gets juicy, too, as the defendant sought to introduce the plaintiff's wife, one Christie Brinkley into the suitⁱⁱ. It's of course not clear if this be the same Francis X. Weber, or a completely unrelated and totally different one. That just happens to be interested in uninteresting movies cum pump-and-dump schemes.

I would hope you've had a chuckle before having your coffee on Saturday, November 24, 2012! If not, I guess you'll have to buy me one.

PS. in the meanwhile...

1. The only thing feeps shear is being left out. Otherwise, no pain, no death, no toil, nor sleet nor rain can disturb them. [↩]
2. From the same William M. Joel v. Francis X. Weber case before the Supreme Court Of New York, New York County on 03/02/92.

   In the subsequent action instituted by FMI against Brinkley, which has been consolidated with the Joel action, FMI alleges that between January 1, 1986 and August 1989 Brinkley (who was married to Joel in 1985) "did wrongfully, knowingly, intentionally, maliciously and without reasonable justification or excuse, induce persuade and entice ... Joel to violate, repudiate, and break" the Agreement, resulting in damage to FMI of $11,000,000. No facts are alleged to support this contention other than an assertion that Brinkley "harbored ill feelings and malice toward FMI as a result of the involvement of Frank Weber in the negotiation and execution" in 1985 of an antenuptial contract between Brinkley and Joel. Apparently Weber had acted as a negotiator for Joel in connection with such contract, pursuant to which FMI was to administer the household account of the parties.

   [↩]